When there is no end in sight

~When there is no end in sight, I employ, work hard. 

When there is no end in sight, make a short term goal to refuse your heart with determination to try harder.

When there is no end in sight, drop all preconceived ideas of what you should be accomplishing.

When there is no end in sight, take heart, for you will soon reap the benefits of your hard work.

When there is no end in sight, never give up hope that you will soon get the revelation that your degree is coming much faster than you previously thought.

When there is no end in sight and your academic advisor tells you that you’re almost done, 

You finally see the light at the end of college and all of your belief and hard work was worth it.

💜,

 ~Alexandra

Ce semestre

Bonjour, mes amours! je ne peux penser a la même façon de décrire de manière appropriée la stress dans ma vie. ma vie est très fou! :p Je suis constamment déplaisir et en essayant de faire que mon avenir fonctionnée. c’est très fatiguant. je suis très fatiguée.

MAIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Je suis fini avec m’éducation a la fini au ce année! 🙂 C’est excitant. En ce moment, en l’école, je suis d’apprentissage le diffèrent formes au le phrases du participe présent. En le semaine dernière, nous avons appris le plus que parfait, les expressions négatif et la structure pour l’inversion au un phrase négatif ou positif. 🙂 C’est très, très, très difficile et je ne suis pas sur pour l’examen en un semaine.

ET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mon amie il y a longtemps pourrait voyage a la France avec moi cet été! oh, les possibilités pour moi cet été, se sont sans fini! 🙂

Ce soir, je vais a une faculté tenue étudiant diner et je fis le cookies! J’aime la nourriture et j’aime la cuisson. Aussi, j’aime le nettoyage et étant a la maison. 🙂 j’aurais été une bonne ménagère / séjour a la maison mère. tant pis. mon avenir est plus prometteur parce-que mon degré et mon aime de la connaissance. 🙂

Donc, je fatigue de pensant en français. Alors, je sortent maintenant.

À plus tard!

Je t’aime!

xoxo

~Alexandra

❤

La traduction: (The translation:)

Hello, my loves! I can’t think of the best way to say how crazy my life is right now. I’m constantly moving and trying to make sure that I have a good future. It’s very tiring, I’m very tired.

BUT!! I will be done with school in a year! Right now in school I’m learning present participle. We learned about past participle and different forms of plus que parfait and inversion from negative or positive sentences. It’s very difficult and I’m not sure how I will do on the test next week.

AND!! My friend from a long time ago might come to France with me this summer! Oh! The possibilities for me this summer are endless.

Tonight, I’m going to a faculty-held student-dinner and I made cookies! I love to cook and bake! I also love to clean. I would have been a good housewife / stay at home Mom.  Oh well, my future will be better because of my degree and  my love of knowledge.

So, I’m tired from thinking in French now, I’ll go now.

All of my love!

~Alexandra

 

 

 

 

 

Loving This!

Hey folks!

I’m pretty excited about life right now . . . . .as you might imagine anyone might be soon after they find out their long awaited release from obligation will arrive in a relatively short amount of time.

By this time of the year (in less than 365 days from now), I will probably  be free of all obligations to education for the rest of my life! Well, unless I decide to go for another degree at some point in the future.

I am just so excited about this summer being the last ‘summer’ of my life before all seasons feel like summer! My academic advisor knows that I am very happy about this news, but I don’t think that she truly understands how big this is for me because of all of the things that happened to me in the past. I have already proved a good half of a dozen doctors wrong not only because I am alive, but also because I am finishing college and I am soon going to be driving and 100% physically capable of doing anything that any other person can do all by myself, but also I have a pretty good story and the fact that my outlook in life is so positive (though it may be naïve) is worthy of mention as well!

Jeeze, I really don’t mean to be cocky or self centered because I think people like that are annoying, but I’m pretty proud of myself. 🙂

When I move back in at my parents’ house, I might look for a small part time job just to keep gas in my car and the ability to go out for food with my friends or family, but that’s about all that I will want to do. :p I don’t need a lot of big fancy things. I will have the ability to take care of myself, and that’s all I will  need for a while, after I move back in at my family’s house. I’m going to look for a local job, just for a few months if I don’t catch wind of something more worthy of a long term position while I’m in Europe this summer!! 😃

Ah! I’m so excited for life! I get to start being an actual person after this year! Up until now, I was nothing more than an infant then a student for my whole life!!!!

This is huge! It’s really scary, what am I going to do with myself now that I’m not a student anymore?

I have to worry about feeding myself and paying bills now. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Well, I will soon anyway.

I don’t even know what I’m good at!  I guess I could be an inspirational speaker, I would just need to get myself back in speech therapy for a bit. Once I get French down, I could go live in France near Spain or Germany or Italy then near some other country and work on more languages, then I can do inspirational speaking in more than just one language!! 😃

Before I run off to France or any other country, I want  to finish my book and see how big I can make that in the United States of America. I hope that at least gives me a good foundation to build my life from.

I am hoping that the book is caught by a hospital or something and I make a few hundred dollars of it from my family and friends in the US and abroad totaling a few thousand dollars. If I make much more than that, I want to start a TBI foundation to benefit the survivors of TBI and families of those afflicted by TBI.

If I make a few hundred thousand dollars off of my book (which is very unlikely) I will make the lives  of my dear family members and friends easier. Also, if I make that much money off of my own experiences, I will pay my hometown back for the moral support and love that I was given after the car accident in 2010.

I have  been told that I have a big heart. But, I don’t really think that is true. I think that I just see how the world is supposed to be and I want or be the example of how to be that way for others to follow.

I know the big secret that humanity has been trying to answer for hundreds of thousands of years, I know why we exist. We humans exist on ehis planet not to rule  it but to maintain it. We are here to love the earth end all of creation just as it is and keep it going just as it does and ought to.

I’m all about love because I am loved so deeply by not only my family, my friends and my hometown but a God so great that humanity cannot even understand it.

I am still alive not just to show that it is possible to come back entirely from a near death experience, but to spread love back into the grains of the  earth. I just hope that I am able to touch enough people and my ‘love movement’ into gear. 💜

🙏🏼🍷🍞

God Bless.

😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘😘💜

Jusqu’à la prochaine fois

~Alexandra 😘

 

WordPress Problems

Hello, beautiful people!

I have begun experiencing complications with logging into WordPress on my laptop. Fortunately for me, my phone is logged into my account. But, I sometimes struggle to be okay with the tiny keyboard.

Like right now, for instance , I am typing with one hand instead of two which limits my left hand’s improvements from the TBI and all that trauma  junk I went through. It’s actually REALLY annoying. This is the FIFTH time I have had issues logging into WordPress on my computer. It’s almost like WordPress doesn’t want me to improve myself.😒

Regardless of what WordPress was, I’m going to figure out this password thing and get back on top of my blogging game by this summer Sheilds I’m in France. 😉😘🇫🇷

So, dear creator of WordPress, I am very annoyed by not being able to log into my site from my computer. If you are able to help me, please do. My preferred email is mullenchick1@gmail.com.

I hope that my fellow bloggers or other readers of my blog don’t take advantage of the fact that my email is in this posting. I’m trusting in “the good of humanity” here, please don’t give me reason not to do so.

 

It’s that time of the semester again

Hello, folks! 💜

i FINALLY got my username and password to work so that I could post another blog!

This week (the fifth? of the semester) has been crazy. I’ve realized that I’m not doing enough homework for French (yet, I sit here and post a blog) and the rest of campus has started to become very itritable and stressed.

Being empathetic (I absorb the emotions of others) is quite miserable when everyone around you either wants to rip everyone else’s head off or cry. Last week I had two exams in French and I’ve taken on the perspective of ‘I know what I know and when I don’t know will show’ and I’ve given up completely on the ‘last minute studying’ thing.

I thunk senioritus may have kicked in. 😜Which, really makes no sense because I just learned that I was a senior less than 3 weeks ago. Oh my goodness! 😦 This year will prove to be interesting . . . . .

I keep saying that I’m a mess and I guess I’ve provided little-no evidence of that in my recent blogs. I seem to have it all together, but I really don’t have anything together. I try to pay attention to schedules and timelines for things, but it’s truly a miracle that I get homework and presentations completed or ready on time.

I wake up each morning, look at the calendar on my phone and usually scrap my assignments or presentations together either first thing in the morning, or very very very late the night before.

My life is a series of BS and honest trials. Somehow (I really don’t understand why I deserve this MERCY) , I usually pull it off with an A or a B. 😜

I seriusly do not understand how stuff works for me. I don’t do enough homework and I usually am completely a mess. But, I’ve decided not to question it too much, because I wouldn’t want to push my ‘luck’ or stretch my GRACE too far. 😉

I wil keep on scrapping my life together bit by bit and hope that it looks relatively decent when I’m done setting myself up. I’m a work in progress, and I will never be perfect. But, I’ve learned to be happy with myself, despite my gross imperfections.

Anyway, this semester has been ‘kicked in’ for a while and I’m still not regularly doing what I should. But I think that I’m okay with that . . . . . After all, “Why fix something that seems to work for me?”.

I’m a little bit lazy at times, but I’m genuinely  happy with who I am and everything else in life, so what does it really matter?

All what I have to in order do to finish college is work my butt off  for another ten months or so. Then I can (essentially) do whatever I want with my life! That is probsbly the very best news I have gotten in over six years! ☺️

I kinda sell myself short, though. I’ve worked really hard to be alive. The car accident and events surrounding it were very hard on my body. My soul, my spirit and most especially my mind have been strengthened and my heart opened up from the experiences that I’ve had. I have become FAR more accepting, much more eager to please and so much more wise within the last 6 years. 💜

I am so incredibly thankful for each breath that I am blessed with and each sensation that I am given. My life is not my own, I exist to please a HOLY, DIVINE and PERFECT God. My heart lies in His hands. I am so lucky to be so loved and greatly cherished.💜😘💜😘💜😘💜😘💜😊💜

I do my best to turn that PERFECT love into a broken love for everything else. Please, take my love and spread it to others! 💜💜

Jusqu’à la prochaine fois.

😘

~Alexandra

xoxo

 

 

 

Better than that

Hello, my lovely readers,

I’ve tried so very hard to keep romantic interests out of my life and out of my way until I finish my undergraduate degree, and I’ve done an alright job at it. I’ve had a few flings that were truly nothing more than flings, but I’ve guarded my heart pretty well in the five years I’ve been at college.

Since IM GRADUATING IN DECEMBER, I’ve thought a little bit  into what kind of guys I’d like to date after I graduate. I’ve essentially come to the conclusion, several times, that there is no ‘type’ of guy for me. All that I want in my life is someone that will care for me and love me for the strange, abnormal person that I am. I’m quirky, I’m weird, I’m anything but what some people refer to as normal. I have this theory that normal is a word used to describe someone that you don’t really know, so I use that word with hesitance in describing myself.

I’m going to waste a few hours (maybe less) in thinking about what I hope for in a partner (boyfriend). Good thing I’m not at home, my Mom would shoot me for doing this when I have so much French homework.

At the moment, I am 113% single and have no true romantic interest. Well, that’s a lie, I do like this one guy, but I have a VERY time reading him and understanding what he’s all about.

In a man, I hope for someone who is strong (mentally, emotionally and psychologically and physically wouldn’t hurt his chances too bad) and able to handle the mess that is Alexandra Mae (me). I would like to know that he is financially stable and able to provide for me and my three basic needs (shelter, food, water) and will have the ability to create a safe and healthy lifestyle for a family. Educated men are the sexiest to me, but so long as he can provide the other things, I don’t even care if he finished high school.

That pretty much sums it all up. But there are, of course, little things that I would like. When I say little things, I mean nice things being done for me like being willing to hold the door for me, or spurprise me with little things such as me coming home from work to see all of the laundry done and the dishwasher running.

I’m fairly simple minded, making me happy doesn’t require much work. Everyone that knows me well knows that I go overboard when it comes to doing nice things for people that are good to me.

I absolutely love to cook and clean so I would have made a great housewife, but I hate to waste the thousands of dollars spent on my education by being a housewife.

I think that I need to be an inspirational speaker, or something to spread the word about TBI victims and possibly facilitate some research being done to help the recovery of TBI victims. I just need to learn to talk about my traumatic experience without getting emotional. Yet I don’t want to seem heartless . . . . . I don’t even know! You see? I’m a mess! Maybe I should straighten myself out, then think about dating someone. I have a hard time focusing as well, apparently. 😜 Haha. Ah, C’est ma vie.😳

Well, I like guys. I like guys that will provide for (with) me. I like guys that are not embarrassed to be seen with me. I like the ones that seem ‘normal’ but are actually weird and querky like me.

I hope that I’ve taught you guys something about the true thoughts of a woman.

(I will be in love with you immediately if you know what this is from->) 🖖🏼

Ce weekend – Le weekend d’amour

Bonjour, tout le monde!

Joyeux le weekend de St. Valentin

J’espère que vous êtes tous se sentir aimé, parce que vous êtes! Je vous aime tous!
:*

.

.

.

.

..

 

.

Alright, I can’t do the whole thing in French, I’m not that good at it yet. :p Maybe after I spend a month or two in France this summer. 🙂 . . . . . Let’s all just hope so, for my education and for my post-undergraduate life.  😉

This article/post isn’t about my aspirations as to fluency in French, though. I wanted to talk about PCM’s weekend of serving.

Yesterday (Friday) , PCM hosted a table at the activities fair, where they opened arms to Freshmen and other students who were looking for activities to participate in.

Today, PCM served at a Community Friendship meal at a local church alongside a fraternity that was doing service-work.

Tomorrow, the most exciting day of the weekend, PCM gets to help PCM’s Minister, Jill hold two services for a church that is about 10-15 minutes from Bloomsburg University.

This is all very exciting because we get to get some hands-on experience behind the pulpit and preparing and delivering a sermon! 🙂

Contrary to popular belief, this weekend is about love, and spreading love. It’s not about getting or giving gifts such as chocolates or engagement rings. Those presents are very lovely, but this holiday is to honor a man that epitomized love, Saint Valentine.

Saint Valentine is a Catholic Saint known for courtly love, young people and happy marriages. I have a link to more information about him attached to this post.

I feel like it should be alongside Christmas as the second most important holiday of all because the Lord Savior Jesus Himself said that LOVE is the most important thing and His disciples went on to carry this message to others.

Essentially, that’s what I want to say and it is now my bed time.

God Bless,

~Alexandra

XoXo

 

Exhaustion

Hey folks!

As the title of this post suggests,; I’m exhausted, I’m also a bit overwhelmed and I am absolutely DYING for a good back and neck massage. Being tall has a few downsides to it, one all of the guys that I like are like three feet shorter than me. :p Two, I have some pretty extreme back and neck problems because of my height. Maybe I wouldn’t have so much pain if I actually worked out more often, but while I’m in semester at college, it’s really hared for me to find time for my own health. The good news here is that I will probably only have to worry about that for about TEN MORE MONTHS!!! 😀 Then I’ll be done! 🙂 . . . Forever! 🙂

I just can’t get over how exciting that is. 🙂

This weekend is very busy and very PCM oriented. Of course, I will need to find time to do some of my French homework and Read for my languages and cultures class, but I believe that I have enough time to get everything done. 🙂

PCM is very special to me, the other members are like my family and I truthfully enjoy spending time with them. 🙂 They make me happy and confident and strong. Mostly confident. I love it when I get to spend time (even if only in conversation online) with people that build me up.<3

I have had a sort of problem this week  . . . . . I’ve been extremely tired by the time my day ends and the instant I set foot into my bedroom, I crave sleep. . . . I’m even having a hard time keeping my eyes open as I type! That has been preventing me from doing homework once I get back to my apartment and it has limited my workouts quite a bit. . . . . Actually, I just forced myself to do one less than an hour ago and I feel a little better, but still exhausted, like God has allowed energy to be taken from my body and put somewhere else. I hope that working out everyday after I get back will help me. Maybe if I was taking my ADHD medication, I would have more energy. Haha . . I should probably be taking it. :p Oh well. . . . .

Well, I won’t be taking it right now, I have the rest of a long weekend ahead of me. :p

Maybe I just need to take naps more often . . . . .I could probably manage a nap between 4:30 pm and 6 pm almost every night.

One thing that I love about serving others is that they usually can’t pay me back with money if they are truly in a position to  need to be served in the first place. I like giving more when I know that the person receiving can’t give back. That feels better than when people give back. A favor is a gift given to someone that needs it. I need to learn to accept favors and not always feel indebted when someone does something nice for me.

Well, that might not always be true, some people do give with the full belief that they deserve to be repaid, and I understand that, I do. I just like giving to people that are in a situation where they cannot give back. Then it’s clear that I do not expect (or want) to be repaid.

Please do not misunderstand me, I am happy to repay any debts that I owe to people, and I appreciate being paid back for large sums of money that I have spent. But, I like it when people are just thankful for the favor. They joy in their lives is plenty more than any sum of money that someone could hand me.

Okay, I’ve started to ramble because I’m less tired today than I was yesterday. So, I am going to wrap it up here and call it a good post.

I hope that all of my readers who see this have/are having or had a wonderfully perfect Valentine’s Day. ❤

God Bless,

All of my love,

Alexandra

Xoxo